The Performer

The Performer
Arty

Audre Lorde

I write for those women who do not speak, for those who do not have a voice because they were so terrified, because we are taught to respect fear more than ourselves. We've been taught that silence would save us, but it won't.

 

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Got it all wong!

Damn!
Am looking at this woman in front of me
Tormenting my eyes with those curvaceous thighs
I can hardly catch my breath

For a moment I feel like I'm losing patience
I have been trynna' wink at her spotless face
She does not notice me and I leap into unconsciousness
That only lasts 2 minutes before

I see her walking towards me and smiling
Huh? Probably she's queer like I am
Oh God! I am afraid to smile back coz
God knows what's on her mind
Her steps towards me take ages despite her being several seconds away

My heart leaps in joy
of realizing that a woman found another irresistible
Two women are appreciating each other's beauty

Ah! the pride of being truly woman
The wow! Moment of a same gender loving womanhood!

She reaches me
Slaps me across the face and curse,
'queer ass shit my foot' slips through her snooty mouth
Before spitting on my new, satin sequined top
and turns to walk away, satisfied with her achievements

In demeaning me
An innocent fellow woman who had nothing fishy
up her sleeve
For being warm towards another!

Passers-by look at me with disgust
Some even bold enough to ask what was brewing

I only summed up by,
'I admired Mommy’s' best friend and was just paying for it!'

By K8



Thursday, January 27, 2011

Press Release. Brutal Killing of Ugandan Gay Human Rights Defender.

Press Release by Sexual Minorities Uganda (SMUG)
For Immediate Release: Wednesday, 26 January 2011
Brutal Murder of Gay Ugandan Human Rights Defender, David Kato

Sexual Minorities Uganda (SMUG) and the entire Ugandan Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Intersex Community stands together to condemn the killing of David Kato and call for the Ugandan Government, Civil Society, and Local Communities to protect sexual minorities across Uganda. 

David was brutally beaten to death in his home today, 26 January 2011, around 2pm.  Across the entire country, straight, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex Ugandans mourn the loss of David, a dear friend, colleague, teacher, family member, and human rights defender.  
David has been receiving death threats since his face was put on the front page of Rolling Stone Magazine, which called for his death and the death of all homosexuals.  David’s death comes directly after the Supreme Court of Uganda ruled that people must stop inciting violence against homosexuals and must respect the right to privacy and human dignity.  

Sexual Minorities Uganda and the Ugandan Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Intersex Community call on the Police and the Government of Uganda to seriously investigate the circumstances surrounding David’s death. We also call on religious leaders, political leaders and media houses to stop demonizing sexual minorities in Uganda since doing so creates a climate of violence against gay persons.  Val Kalende, the Chair of the Board at Freedom and Roam Uganda stated that “David’s death is a result of the hatred planted in Uganda by U.S Evangelicals in 2009. The Ugandan Government and the so-called U.S Evangelicals must take responsibility for David’s blood!”

As United Nations Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon recently declared, “I understand that sexual orientation and gender identity raise sensitive cultural issues.  But cultural practices cannot justify any violation of human rights. . .  . When our fellow humans are persecuted because of their sexual orientation or gender identity, we must speak out. . . . States bear the primary responsibility to protect human rights advocates.  I call on all States to ensure the freedom of expression and the freedom of assembly that make their work possible.  When the lives of human rights advocates are endangered, we are all less secure.  When the voices of human rights advocates are silenced, justice itself is drowned out.” 

David’s life was cut short in a brutal manner.  David will be deeply missed by his family and friends, his students, and Human Rights organizations throughout Uganda and around the world.  Speaking about what the death of David means in the struggle for equality, Frank Mugisha, the Executive Director of Sexual Minorities Uganda said, “No form of intimidation will stop our cause. The death of David will only be honored when the struggle for justice and equality is won.  David is gone and many of us will follow, but the struggle will be won. David wanted to see a Uganda where all people will be treated equally despite their sexual orientation.”

Burial arrangements are underway for Friday 28, 2011 at 2PM at his ancestral home in Namataba, Mukono District. 

Press contacts:
Frank Mugisha: +1 646 436 1858
Email. fmugisha@sexualminoritiesuganda.org
Val Kalende:   +1 857-247-1184
Email. kalendenator@gmail.com
Pepe Julian: +256 772 370 674

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Happy 2011!

Happy new year lovely people!

Happy new year to what?

Women getting raped every second in Kenya?
Politicians playing 2010 politics with when hungry Kenyans are dying of hunger?
Railaism that keeps reminding that gay community have no place in this society let alone have rights?


I have been pondering over these and other issues over this new year. I got tired of making new year resolutions coz I hardly ever stuck to any 365 days later! I instead concentrated on investing my energy around violations that women and men especially in the gay community face on a day to day basis.

Last year we lost several members of our community to disease and the very last one in December 2010 to violence. However, have you paused to think about how many LGBTI people in Kenya commit suicide for realizing that their being themselves causes so much pain to their families, instigate hate from every corner they seek an understanding ear and so on? Has it ever crossed your mind that you may have uttered a word that may have offended someone over the past year or acted in a way that would automatically make another feel like you do not really care for them?

Do you rejoice at watching someone's heart break to pieces right before your eyes? Or have you put a smile on someone's face and manage a bounce at the end of the day/night? There was a lot for me to think about and as I ushered in 2011, in my bed, I was overwhelmed by all these feelings. I listened intently to neighbours at the new place I now called home screaming and shouting hours before midnight (which was the countdown to 2011) and I asked myself, 'so what?' Life goes on...it should go on but how come nothing about violence changes? Nothing about discrimination has ever changed. Right about the time someone is busy ushering the new year, a helpless woman is probably pinned down by some bloody male to strip the dignity in her! Another is dying of hunger...and another mother is giving her final blessings to her children before she quits living.

I had very many reasons to celebrate the end of 2010 and the beginning of 2011, but I could not quite get myself in the celebratory mood. Thankfully, I will never save the world and I know it, but can I make situations better than they are now? Can I make time to sit and brainstorm with the women to see how we can get our very own from the streets? From doing blow jobs to get Ksh.50 for a plate of oil dripping french fries? From getting their cunts invaded by drunk men who cannot find their way home but have all the energy in the world to fuck?

Is it possible to reduce the number of men who have sex with men (msm) contracting HIV/AIDS in Kenya today? Can we do the same for the many gay women that have made careers out of alcoholism, drugs and substance abuse qualifying them for cancers and all? Then someone asks, ' why should I bother about another who, besides being part of my community never cares for themselves?' And I'll ask you, 'what have you done...have you tried reaching out to them? Have you tried to identify whether they are emotionally in distress? What makes you think that you are any better than they are? These are too many questions to ask but am wondering why I think so much? Its mind boggling, and unlike you, I love it!

It gives me the energy to see another day (if god grants it)! Its 2011, I have not made any new year resolutions, I am not intending to come up with any...oh! Well I did. (ha ha ha) I vowed never to smoke cigarettes...until today, 18 days later, when the urge was too strong and irresistible that I had to dash to the kiosk outside the office and puff the afternoon away! See? I felt silly afterwards but am sayin' this: I will not do it again. I will not!

Anyway, I will leave you with that to think about...thank you for the emails you have been sending me. You made the year 2010 worthwhile for me! You inspired me to write a great deal of beautiful stuff, some that have been published (of course with permission) by several journals within and outside of Kenya.

I am back, to give you a lil' piece of me, humbly and relentlessly. I love you! Hope to start seeing some of you very soon...and I meanm VEEEERRRRRYYYYYYY!!!!

Kiss
K8





Sunday, November 28, 2010

16 Days of Activism for No Violence against Women and Children Don't look away, act against abuse

The 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children is campaign aimed to make people aware of the negative impact of violence on women and children and to act against abuse.
 
What can you do?

•Support the campaign by wearing the white ribbon during the 16-day period: A white ribbon is a symbol of peace and symbolises the commitment of the wearer to never commit or condone violence against women and children.

•Participate in the various 16 Days of Activism events and activities:

•Volunteer in support of NGOs and community groups who support abused women and children: Many organisations need assistance from the public. You can volunteer your time and make a contribution to the work of institutions. Help plant a garden at a shelter, etc….Use your skills and knowledge to help the victims of abuse.

•Donations: any form of donation, money, food, cloths and the organizations that are helping the woman and children.

•Speak out against woman and child abuse. Encourage silent female victims to talk about abuse and ensure that they get help. Report child abuse to the police. Encourage children to report bully behaviour to school authorities. Men and boys are encouraged to talk about abuse and actively discourage abusive behaviour.

•Join community policing forums (CPFs). 

•Seek help if you are emotionally, physically or sexually abusive to your partner and/or children. Call the Stop Gender Based Violence helpline (0800 150 150).Talk to friends, relatives and colleagues to take a stand against abuse of women and children. Try and understand how your own attitudes and actions might perpetuate sexism and violence. 

Together, let us take actions to support the 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children Campaign.

Don't look away, act against abuse 

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Cunt invasion (RAPE) by K8 Kamunde

I believed in my friends when I gave them this one to read and critique. Being very passionate about women issues, I could simply not ignore this very important part of the torture women got through.

I was extremely confident in my work when I submitted it for review, but the comments did not come without the, 'why's' and the 'at least make it polite' in quotes! They asked me to make RAPE POLITE? I was not baffled by that, and nope, these comments came from my fellow women! I was not in the least surprised...it only defined one work as Inga Muscio puts it; CUNT HATRED! 

So, in my bid to make my stand and thoughts on rape very clear, I opted not to act in the affirmative but let my feelings speak, for all the women of the world and I. For our lovely cunts! Well, it's time for 'RAPE!'

Mmmhhh? Don’t look at me that way, I know men also get raped, but the women experience it more and since I am one of them, I will speak on their behalf!

I define rape as the act of stripping the power in a woman by a powerless man… Rape rings danger bells to any woman that walks around on her own at night…Rape is committed by men who have not began exercising their powerlessness thus leading them to re-discovering new ways to do that by inserting their broomsticks in the cunts of innocent women/girls and children. I am not sorry if you think I am rude! And drop the crap about women’s dressing that leads to their being raped…haven’t we all been there, done that?

Rape is a slap of silence as has been and continues to be with some urban and most women from the grass roots.

It shuts you out of the world and its happenings and one retreats to their cocoons to hide the anger, pain, torture, resentment and all! Rape is a constant reminder that I, the woman and the special world I call ‘cunt’ is never safe. Would I opt to then chop it off (of course not to sell it to some crazy baboons that think they can come up with some sick HIV antidote) and eliminate all these troubles of having my sexuality invaded by some dick of a man? Never, not in a hundred thousand years Honey! I am a woman who has a sexy, beautiful cunt, that  I am extremely proud of! Got that?

Rape is an ape minus R.

My best friend Kendi was abducted by five men as she negotiated a corner on her way home from work. They took her to a forest several miles away from home and raped her in turns. As if that was not gory enough, they gouged her eyes out and buried them a few metres away from the rape scene, leaving her for the dead. They never stole anything from her…someone, please convince me that this bastards were human because I am thinking otherwise. Their inhuman hood should be butchered and roasted in their full view!

My dear friend Kendi made it, but has never gotten over the torture ten years later. She knew the men only too well since they were her next door neighbors that seemed really friendly for a period of over two years. She was too bitter with life, with the fact that being a woman alone subjected her to gang rape, that she contemplated suicide severally.

We have been her pillar of support…we have proven that women that undergo rape can keep existing and beat all odds…we have shared our pain and experiences…we have many times cried and sought solace in each other’s handkerchiefs, arms and shoulders, not forgetting the cups of coffee we constantly chat over.

Rape is a monster that only knows best how it deprives women of the power to speak out, the power to be themselves. Rape graduates women to feeling useless, hating their cunts, wallowing in alcohol and drugs to seek help silently, degrading the very reasons they exist, depression and self pity. Rape does not only happen to the daughter of your grandmother’s third class cousin who died in the 1890’s! Rape does not happen to women we know rarely about, it happened to she and I…it is bound to happen to you too if it has not.

Rape is an issue that no religious clerics stand to condemn…they would never make time to, because rape is just okay while being gay is NOT! None of them have held demonstrations to put the government to task in setting up policies that will ensure that all those rapists out there, walking scot free, bribing their way out of jails, raping the community out of life and making out of court settlements with victims and their families are properly castrated or locked up for life!

But NOOOOOO! Prison nowadays is heaven on earth, a land of no struggle. They have access to everything from education (well, this is ok), to frequent visits by their families when they get to negotiate on when and how sex will be smuggled in prisons, to fashion shows, gospel extravaganzas and so on. They have been given a chance to watch television, look at all those beautiful women in those electric boxes and tempt the rapists among them (as well as recruit potential ones) to plot their next rape encounters on their release! What a pity?

How hypothetical could this get? How real can this be? What about the media? Well, they try…but in only bringing the stories to light and doing shoddy interviews. After that the rape news item is done, they find the mention okay and every similar story goes by just like that. It’s ignored like nothing mega really took place!

Media is powerful; it can effectively engage the general public in a ‘help stop rape’ campaign…maybe it could be an issue some creative but passionate journalists would want to look into.

Wangu Kanja on the other hand is doing the best she can…I commend her efforts and especially in using her personal experience in the hands of rapists to touch people’s lives in a very special way…she touched the victim in me! She is one of the women who I have known to be very strong willed in terms of taking the ‘rape’ talk beyond the shock on the screens at news hour!

 It is a tough decision to make when it comes to disclosing that one has been raped in their lives and risk being looked at by fellow women as a slut/whore whose duty is to incite men to eroticism and get rape for a reward…to be perceived by men as ‘used rags’ that no man should dare inching closer to…a community that is so keen on blaming the raped and not the rapist!!!
Yet again, how sad?

Why do we have all these sponsored cancer, deaf, eye walks but no one had bothered to speak out for the scores of women raped on an hourly basis? Please, let’s stop this hypocrisy guys…it is plain and downright disgusting.

To the Nairobi Women's Hospital, KUDOS for the good job you are doing in helping women that have gone through rape incidents to keep existing, keep healthy both physically and emotionally, but is that all?

Truth is, through our silence in speaking against rape, we have encouraged the vice, women and girls that keep getting raped have boarded the ‘silence bus’. We will always get our statistics wrong, because very few are willing to speak out. We will encourage the perverts and sick broomsticks to do their thing, and walk home satisfied at their achievements in striping the people we are. Reducing our productivity…griping us with fear and preventing us from attaining our full potential.

I challenge you and I. I was raped, she was about to get raped, You have not yet been raped, but it is not an assurance you will not be! Don’t say that because it never happened to you then it’s not in your business to do anything. You are a woman and in as much as the unfortunate newborns are welcomed into the world by getting abused, you are susceptible to RAPE.

This vice has to be tackled head on, whether we like it or not!

The time is now, kina dada, mama na wasichana na tuungane kuangamiza kidonda hiki katika jamii!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

What do you like most in your partner?

My mind has been discussing this topic for a while now and I thought, ‘why don’t I bring this up in this beautiful house I call my blog?’ Most women in relationships chose to concentrate on their partner’s wrongs. They are comfortable spending their free time discussing their partners, obviously in negative light. What most of us forget is to all the negatives we see in our partners, there are always positives that make our relationships worth fighting for. How many times have you made time to look at the good side of your partner? How many times do you appreciate having her in your life? How often do you say ‘I love you’, not because you have to but because those sacred words are from the core of your heart? This is the time!


Honesty here as usual works for me. I have several friends who bad mouth their partners with their close friends. I don’t understand how you expect them to feel when they get to know that you are doing that. I have always insisted that people should  face their problem head on…have a sitting with her and communicate what does not please you about her. What goes around comes around. Several relationships have crumbled from this ‘inside gossip’. Some situations have been easy to mend and start all over again but sadly, none has passed the test of time. I may not exactly understand how you feel dear reader, but I would certainly try to understand and be there.


So, what do you like most in her? The way she does her make-up, or is it the way she goes around in clubs kissing her ex girlfriend? Is it her looks that you like most? Those that make you unnoticeable whenever you are out with her and every Claudia, Grace and Charity is hitting on her? Her personality and sense of style? Her love for music or her goth image? Her ability to make your pockets empty while you’re out on a shopping spree? Jeez! Or  is it her magic in bed? Maybe it’s her job and the position she holds at work…or the fact that you’re with her because the one you really want has already been taken. Others are in relationships because they find it entirely difficult to say that they are single and so on and so forth.


You will be surprised because these are some of the responses I got from a majority of women. I must say this did not really get me by surprise. The way women are treating their partners these days is enough to prove that the only reason they are in relationships is for convenience.


I don’t believe in the ‘power of positive thinking’... The power of thinking positively is the biggest load of crap I have had to deal with. It is simply living a hypocritical lie. You see something real, evaluate it, then shift it… changing the way we see real situations, a battle that goes on in the head. I cannot for instance hold on to an abusive relationship of many years by assuming that the abuse is non-existent while I have enough body marks to show for it! If a relationship does not do IT for you then it’s not worth your effort.


Let us evaluate our relationships, let us involve our partners in this process since it is truly worthwhile. Let us know the things they like about us and vice versa. No one is perfect…I am not perfect. I know how far I have come, the challenges I have encountered, the many times I have failed…the many times friends and foes have brought me down. These are lessons I appreciate going through…they have made me wiser in making what I am today.  My relationship is my life. I communicate what I like about my partner…even if God gave me a second chance…a second life, it would still find me with the same person I have chosen to be with. Telling your partner how you really feel about them will set you free, it will develop their trust in you. It will not cost you anything…just try it!


Take care and thank you for your time.


K8




Friday, October 8, 2010

For my late Mama Harriet (Hattie)

October is a special month to me. One thing that comes to mind during this month is BREAST.

October is a sad month too! I lost my mother to breast cancer in September, 2005 a month before this one which goes out to those that lost their lives to breast cancer, those that continue surviving with it and to create awareness to those that have not taken the step to get tested.

 I have mourned and continue to mourn the loss of my mother, the only parent I knew, one that stood by me no matter what, one who denied herself so many things to see the people around her smile. One who represented the stigma faced by single mothers in society who were and still are looked at as whores, husband snatchers and all! One who quietly screamed out the problems violence and marital rape experienced by married women. Losing the ‘best mother in the world’ was not something I looked forward to, at 24!

She was a gentle but firm soul that brought warring families and communities together. She brought us up in a way no parent would. She introduced important subject such as sex and cunt to me while I was a very little girl. She told me to find out what my cunt looked like, she told me all about condoms and men. I never had reason to experiment with men because the 'best teacher in the world' had taught me! She is the reason I have come this far.

She was the voice of strength that resonated within very dark corners of our village, the community. She was a heart where many found solace. She had the right words to say at the very right time they were required! She was a strict parent who found balance in friendliness and standing firm by her word. Punishment befell any of us that went contrary to the required. She did this in a re-affirming way and none of us had reason to develop hatred or feel discriminated.

Mama Harriet is a name that is constantly mentioned in Meru Central District by those she dearly loved..her neighbors…friends of friends…patients…families…enemies!

Watching mama slowly fade away, sponging her face and body every morning of everyday of her life in hospital, watching her fight so hard to stay alive…fight for life…fight to keep breathing and see us through school were memories that I will take to my grave!

Walking on the streets of Nairobi, seeing images of mama ahead of me and hurrying to meet them has become a comfort that she is not really gone…just walking beside, before, above and below me…watching over me…speaking to me! Inspiring me…

The best way I could mourn my Mama’s loss is to remind us to get tested. The fact that you do not engage in sex with men does not mean that you are out of trouble Woman. Most of us smoke, that is one other potential risk, let us go for those pap smear tests. Let us DIY (do it yourself) at home. We will be glad we did it! I love you guys!

Rest in Peace Mama!
Your daughter K8