The Performer

The Performer
Arty

Audre Lorde

I write for those women who do not speak, for those who do not have a voice because they were so terrified, because we are taught to respect fear more than ourselves. We've been taught that silence would save us, but it won't.

 

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Changes

I am going through changes, changes
God I feel so frustrated…rated
Someone please save me, save me, save me
I am going through tough changes, changes

It was all a lie
And I kept denying it wasn't coming
Mama always told me…nothing is as it seems
I thought she probably made a mistake on that one!
And now that I ignored it, it's ripping me apart…
Pulling me away from the ME I used to know
The ME that was always me

I looked around me
And all I saw was ash
The ashen flesh of my past…of my pain…of no gain
I want to run…so far away
Because I relied on too much
Believed in the extraordinary things
Believed that love could patch up and mend the tears
Hate could melt and clean up the stains on my skin

I have so many regrets
One of them …..trust me you don't have to know if you don't by now!
Maybe its something else
I hate darkness, I hate lies, I fear heights…you made me fear you
Its been a rough one…and you ain't making it better
And those around me cheer in joy
To my great disappointment
My face looks down in shame
For believing in one chance….that never will be!

Now I'm going through changes
Am comforted to know someone's there
But how?
How? I'm going through changes
Sipping water from people's wells instead of my own
God, I feel so frustrated…rated
I am thoroughly shaken…shaken
Cannot believe its happening….happening..worst of all, to me!

This cruel emotion
Your harsh conclusions
Our indefiniteness
The pretentious grins
The secrets…
I have got to carry mine…and if they kill me
Then I'll sure be gone before I know it
Just remember…
It was our fault… Chao Bella

By K8’s

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